Editor’s note: This entry is dedicated to Amanda for her continuous reading of my boring journey through life.
We did a walk-through of the house last night and it’s not as big as I remembered, but it’s still super lovely. It’s more dated than I remembered, too, in certain regards. I had totally forgotten about the third, hidden bathroom! Lol. But it’s okay. There’s a lot to consider. Eric asked me if I had any concerns about the house, and at the time, I didn’t… but now I do.
Now I’m worried about space. What happens when we have more than one kid and thus need to move the older kid to a bedroom downstairs? That space will be Eric’s band space, so… I don’t really know where all that will move to.
I don’t like the master bathroom. There, I said it. I love part of it, but I hate how cramped the toilet/shower area is. That is a major problem for me. I mean, I could get used to it, I’m sure… but it just seems so… cramped! And dark! I’d need to put Christmas lights up around the ceiling or something for ambience. There are ways to make a bathroom a home, I guess. I’d probably just use the bathroom downstairs by the family room most of the time anyway. I don’t know. I guess it shouldn’t be a deal breaker.
Eric mentioned the yard was mostly dirt. It wasn’t just wet mud from the rain, but it was legit dirt. That’s going to be a humongous pain in the dick with the dogs. Additionally, the yard is on a hill, so that might suck. Since I won’t be the one in charge of (I almost typed vacuuming) mowing the lawn, it doesn’t really matter to me if the backyard is slanted and I sincerely doubt the dogs will care very much.
I don’t care for the deck. I don’t appreciate above-ground pools for some reason, so I don’t really want one. It’s not a deal breaker, I don’t think… but I need to look at it again.
Eric mentioned all the intercom speakers throughout the house. THEY ARE EVERYWHERE! SO MANY FREAKING SPEAKERS! But they don’t work. They’re all super yellow because they’re from the 1970s, and they didn’t really bother me… until they bothered Eric, and now I’m afraid they’re all I’m going to see. I guess maybe years and years down the line, we might have enough money to get the damn system functioning again, but I’d rather just rip them all off the walls. Can we do that? Can you remove those? It’s not hard to dry-wall over a hole… so… I’ll have to ask Eric.
Where would I put my treadmill? Right now, I’m thinking down in the room with the doorway that goes to the front yard. The room by the garage! But that room would have to become Eric’s band room if we ever have more than one kid (as I mentioned).
Thinking now – is the master bedroom even big enough for our stuff? I have a dresser, Eric has a dresser, and our bed is humongous.
I didn’t notice if there was a washer or dryer, but I’ll ask Eric if he did. If he didn’t either, then we’ll have to ask the realtor. That would be a big deal.
I was concerned earlier about fitting our family room furniture into the family room space by the fireplace because of those damn poles, but I figured it out – one of the chairs will go upstairs in the main room (aka: computer room, baby!).
There is plenty of storage down in the basement. There’s also that odd little room that I guess would be where my treadmill would go if Eric needed to turn the workout room into his band space. Good Lord, we have so much stuff. I wish this house had a full-size basement. Maybe my mom was right…
One thing my mom was absolutely right about is the fact that the house is not at all kid-friendly. The railings and banisters are everywhere! The extra bedrooms are mostly all downstairs, away from the master, so that’s not ideal when we’ll be dealing with sneaky-ass teenagers. But toddlers are going to be a disaster. We will need baby gates on either side of those stairs, going up the main level to the upstairs and down the main level to the underground and from the underground to the basement. SO MANY BABY GATES!!!
I don’t like that we’d have to walk through the middle of the house to get groceries to the kitchen. I am pretty used to the standard houses where the kitchen is usually the room that y’all walk into from the garage. But hey, at least the garage is attached and it even has that extra little basement. Jules and Matt spent roughly the same amount of money on their house and they don’t have as much space, it seemed. I don’t know, I was drunk when I was over there. I’m always drunk, and I hate it. Well, I’m never drunk at work, so at least I’ve got that going for me.
There’s no railing on the front porch. If those stairs get icy, people will most certainly die. I’m just sayin’!
Just noticed – there’s no entryway closet! But what about the coats?! Where will we hang our coats and winter crap?! Wait, there might be a closet right by the kitchen doorway area… I think I see one. I should have opened it.
It is a few hours later so I’ve had some more time to reflect. I looked at some other real estate options in the general vicinity that Eric and I are looking in. I found one really cute one in a neighborhood pretty close to Timily, but I drove by it at lunch and it is tucked away in a dated, tight neighborhood. It was not where I had originally thought it was. Plus, tons of cars were there. The two cars directly in front of me down Veterans and Old Jacksonville ended up turning into the neighborhood, and then they were sooooooo slow, and of course, they stopped at the house. I’m not sure if there was some sort of something happening there, but it was packed, that’s for damn sure.
So that one is probably coming off of my list because it’s not what I thought.
Plus, the entire time I was driving there, it felt wrong.
I love the Oakwood house. I love the name of the street. I love the little neighborhood, despite the fact that it doesn’t have sidewalks. I love the house number – 13! That way, I’ll still have part of Crystal Lake with me. I want to decorate the porch and put big, colorful, stone vases and flower pots out there. I won’t let anyone fall off and die – I’ll block it off with flowers!
RANDOM TANGENT TIME — I fucking hate dry mouth. It is the devil’s work, I tell you! I’m not sure why I always have it, but I do and it’s the legit worst. I know Wellbutrin gives it to me so horribly, but I have to take the Wellbutrin to fight off the side effects of the Prozac! And I need the Prozac for my crazy! So, it’s a conundrum.
Alright, back to the house. The more I think about the house, the more perfect it really becomes. I’ve started decorating it in my mind. But alas, I’m moving way too ahead of myself. Eric and I don’t even know what size loan we could get approved for.
Speaking of, we are meeting with a lady named Joy Guilliante today at 4 PM. (I made up that spelling of her name… I have no idea how to spell it.) That is precisely one hour and five minutes from now. I’d really like to get out of here ASAP so I can swing by home and take a shower real quick before we go. I’d like to look presentable… this is a big deal. I never went with Eric Meyer to the bank, so I have no idea what I’m doing or what to expect. I feel judged by our financial situation, and I don’t think we’re going to be able to get a loan THAT size, which hurts my feelings really bad. But life is hard and life is expensive, and even if we do get a loan… should we buy that house, or is it too expensive for us?
I hate how poor we are. I’d be okay if we had everything we needed, and then we saved, saved, saved. I don’t want to have to sacrifice cable, so I think I’d just get rid of Hulu and keep Netflix and cable. I’m keeping Amazon, too, only because I adore having an Amazon Prime account for the 2 day shipping and amazeballs deals I can get on there. It would be too much to get rid of that. But I won’t keep Hulu.
Basically, I’m having a lot of feels. Like, literally all of the feels. One minute, I feel all gung-ho about the house, but then the next minute, I’m backtracking and rethinking. HA! Story of my life!
But I really want this. And I honestly don’t think Eric and I’s financial situation will change very much if we waited a year before looking for a forever house. Maybe having next to nothing in my savings account will make me finally buck up and change my spending habits once and for all.
I could talk myself into it. I could talk myself out of it. And maybe, just maybe, that alone is why I’ll be okay regardless of what happens at the bank this afternoon. If it is bad news, then I’ll just pep talk myself that it was a bad idea to get a house right now anyway. If it’s good news, then we’ll see where life takes us. Either way, I know I will be okay so long as I tell myself to be.
Wow, I’m confusing myself.
I’m actually not sure if I’ll even have time to get a shower in anyway because Vickie is still here and is showing zero signs of packing up and getting the heck out! I shouldn’t leave if she’s here because, um, obvious town. BUT I WANNA!
Once the meeting with the banker is over, I’m running out to PJ’s real quick and Eric is going to band practice. I need to make cornflake chicken tonight for dinner to make up for the ass-foolery clown I was last night. I don’t do so well when I drink on a week night, especially on an empty stomach. But the walk-through went so well that vodka obviously seemed like the right celebratory thing to do… but then I just got stupid. It always ends in the stupids now if I drink. LAMESIES! I’m getting old… I AM old.
OH HEY VICKIE JUST GOT HER PURSE OUT! THIS IS ALL GOOD NEWS!
OH HEY VICKIE JUST ACTUALLY LEFT HUZZAHSIES
I might be able to leave here in roughly 5 minutes, make it home at 3:30, and… nah, I’ll shower after it’s over, unfortunately. There’s just no way I’d be able to make it. I mean, maybe if I left right now and sped a little bit, lol. I’ll make a hasty decision about it later, in the moment.
Anyway, I guess I’m going to start shutting down shop for the day. I’m so fucking nervous about meeting with the bank. You have no idea! Eric isn’t nervous, so that’s good. I made sure to print out a few pay stubs, and we have the house information. Ah, this is nerve-wracking, yo. I’m outtie.
And remember children, spice is the spice of life.